Pressure to Action

You don't need to dive into all the psychological theories developed on motivation (Carrot and stick approach, Maslow needs hierarchy, Herzberg’s motivation-hygiene theory, Vroom's expectancy theory and so on and so forth...) Goal setting for life can be broken down into two forces: Push and Pull.

I first listened to this breakdown by Elliot Hulse on his YouTube video "The Only Reason to Run". Elliot discusses (linked below) a college baseball player that contacts him for advice about lacking motivation to exercise and run. We are dealing with intrinsic (doing activity for inherent satisfaction) and extrinsic motivations. The PUSH PULL I am discussing is extrinsic - behavior driven by external reward or punishments. The reality is your intrinsic satisfaction and motivation to continue may drop significantly or wane as you meet challenges leading to fatigue and goal failure. A beginner musician is a great example of this. An accomplished musician has the fundamentals down so that practice can be leisure and intrinsically pleasing or technical hard work at their choosing. Leading up to setting goals, this is what we all deal with in making decisions on what to pursue, job choices, romantic mate choices, etc. You can set goals all day but if you don't have that PUSH or PULL it will be a gargantuan flop.

The young college player waiting on his ticket to the big leagues obviously has athleticism, skill, talent and has put work in over his lifetime (assuming his story is true). However, we can also make some assumptions like Elliot does that the young college player is very comfortable. College tutors, meal plan at the fancy meal hall, branded athletic wear, sponsorships, scholarships, membership of a branded cheered for tribe, maybe a vehicle and many other creature comforts. Believe it or not in the current moment these outweigh his potential for multi-million contracts and generational wealth building for a future family. However, another college student with less or a humbler upbringing and lower-class parents or maybe a ballplayer in a developing country is hustling much harder running every day extra miles and training 10x as hard for the opportunity. Major League Baseball and other sports find these athletes every day. They are running towards (PULL) the major league dream but the wolf of poverty and poor living conditions is (PUSH) and biting at their heels. Sometimes when we are comfortable the (PULL) is not enough.

Robert Greene the famous author of 48 Laws of Power and Mastery discusses placing yourself on "death ground" (linked below). He explains you have to "create necessity". We are all mostly too comfortable in modern society. This principle is talking about full immersion and jumping in with both feet. I think this is important because we all fall victim to this (if our basic needs are met and we are living a comfortable life). This goes back to the PUSH and PULL. Personally, I believe everyone should do a risk assessment before jumping in with both feet and digging yourself in a hole to deep. Bottom line: If you have family you are responsible for or are a single parent - don't quit your job. If you're in a position to struggle and be a little hungry financially and perhaps literally, that is your prerogative. Joe Rogan (linked below) discusses this at the start of his career as a stand-up comedian. Thus was probably born the side-hustle. Or you work 2-3 jobs and chase your ______. If you are unable to put yourself on "death ground" literally, you have to do some creative framing and adjusting in your mind assuming it is something you have a burning desire to do.

How many times have you thought to yourself, "I'd like to do that." or you get a jolt of excitement with the thought of learning ______. Then you start researching it or never invest the time because it starts to overwhelm you or you realize you are just playing at it. Part of being an adult is learning to separate the, "I'd like to..." or "That sounds intriguing" from "This is my goal and I am all in, these are my strong reasons pushing or pulling me." Now, you can manipulate this somewhat in your mind, but the willpower is only so strong. All adults have experienced this with desires set as goals that faded. This could range from weight loss, to dating/romance goals, learning music, language or coding. If your push/pull reason is weak when the going get toughs you flop. We have all been there and that's okay.

Earl Nightingale in one of his audio recordings discusses a woman complimenting a pianist at a party with the cliché statement "I'd give anything to play as beautifully as you." The pianist quietly but firmly replies, "No, no you would not." The room gasps for air collectively and glasses stop moving and you could hear a pin drop. What was intended as a compliment was really not the whole truth. The pianist educated the woman that if that was truly her desire, she would have put hours, days months, and ultimately 10 plus years to play with the skill demonstrated by the pianist at that party.

Helpful Strategies Before Goal Selection

I will present 5 tricks for avoiding the gargantuan flops of failure on your next half-baked goal. Failing on a half-baked goal causes you distress. Implement these 5 tricks for full-baked success.

1.) Pause and analyze what just sparked your interest. Spend 15 mins learning about it HONESTLY decide if you want to put the work in. Is your interest and desire level 10 (intrinsic motivation) to get through the sludge and set-backs? If it's not, then this is not the goal for you at this time. Life is short - why beat yourself over the head every day to accomplish something you don't really want to do (even if you might be pretty decent at it).

2.) Identify your PULL (extrinsic motivation) or the carrot (money, big money, fame, fun, freedom, power, pleasure).

3.) Identify your PUSH (extrinsic) or the stick (family situation, living situation, dissatisfaction job or boss, lack of money, bills, debt).

4.) If you only have PULL, are you red hot about it? Do you wake up thinking about it, daydream about it, go to bed thinking about it? Jump in and proceed. Otherwise, do not proceed.

5.) If you only have PUSH, is it a level 10? Are the mice crawling across your bedroom floor or are your tired of living out of your car? Jump in and proceed. Otherwise, do not proceed.

Don't dabble - unless you are okay dabbling as a hobby or relaxation. Otherwise, you will be repeating self-sabotage on your goals and setting yourself up for failure. You can manufacture with some mental creativity PULL and PUSH or change your environment and jump in the deep end. If you have great PUSH and PULL the odds are more in your favor. Lastly, pivot and put goals to bed. If you aren't running or putting in the extra hours training, resign yourself to being complete at your current level achieved like our college baseball player that contacted Elliot. GO ALL IN or LET IT GO.

YouTube Video Links

-Elliot Hulse "The Only Reason to Run" (Warning Explicit Language - 10 minutes)

-Robert Greene "Death Ground." (3 minutes)

-Joe Rogan "Quiet Lives of Desperation" (3 minutes)

If you found value, knowledge, enjoyment, hysteria, hilarity or general entertainment from this article, please subscribe to my paid newsletter for only $7 month and send this to others. A new newsletter drops every Sunday. Everyone can enjoy the free 30 day trial before charge. Yearly discount available. Let's grow together...